– Plus Life and Times of carolkmail

When I Feel Lost

Never fear letting your vulnerability show, because then you’ll never get yourself unlost.

I follow a blog by a very awesome woman called Penelope Trunk. One of the most fascinating things about her is that she is not shy to tell you who she is, where she’s come from, what she is going through and how she is coping. I suppose that makes her appear human, and therefore, her readers can relate. She does not shy away from insults hurled at her, and she takes to answering them with amazing poise in stride.

Recently, she had an article How To Be Lost with Panache . As I read through the article, it occurred to me that this is a common thing that plagues all of us. Feeling lost, you can’t seem to make head or tail of anything. You don’t necessarily need to be suffering from Asperger Syndrome as she does to experience this. It just happens sometimes.

Me Behind the Camera Staring Into Space! Nothing's more relaxing...

The article got me thinking, I do feel lost at times. I’m not always bubbly and smart headed (yep! I’m human after all) So, what techniques do I use to fight this feeling? I retreat into myself. This has become more of a healing technique that my body has adapted to. We can never always be completely blue or completely bubbly. That is not normal, so don’t go arguing with me on that one. The trick is not to punish yourself. Acknowledge and embrace the feeling, find what calms you down, and get yourself absorbed in it.

For me, the most effective methods have been;

1. Reading. Nothing in particular but just getting absorbed in reading.
2. Going for long, long walks.
3. Sitting quietly in a room, no music, no noise, just silence.
4. Writing in my journal. Yes, you’d have fun reading that journal but you won’t.

So long as you embrace it and acknowledge it as a passing phase, you will not even know when it finally passes. Glide along and be happy you have a chance to turn inward for healing and personal strength.


13 responses

  1. This is a Good Read Carol, Most of us spend time Tense and panicking over a deadline, something we have failed at or in anxiety over something we expect… It is important to sometimes just breath and live life as it is… see nature and withdraw from set norms. Me needs to start walking around… not aimlessly though 🙂 Good Stuff!

    August 24, 2010 at 10:54 am

    • carolkmail

      I agree. We need to realize some of these experiences makes us human. P.s I do not walk around aimlessly! nkt! 😀

      August 24, 2010 at 3:36 pm

  2. When I feel lost I like to randomly open the Bible and see what it has to say to me at that particular point in time. Many times I have flipped it open and it has snapped me back to reality.

    August 24, 2010 at 3:27 pm

    • carolkmail

      Yes I know…. It is another way to really feel encouraged. I’m glad it does work for you 🙂

      August 24, 2010 at 3:38 pm

  3. OtienoHongo

    Nice read, I have felt lost many times when I have felt I am going to fail at something (and the prospect of failure really embarrasses me)! And many a times I have gone to Rudyard Kipling’s IF. I always find a line that speaks to me in that poem! Keep the cool writing coming!!!

    August 25, 2010 at 11:04 am

    • carolkmail

      Prospect of failure scares, more than embarrases me. Thanks to you, I just went looking for that Poem by Rudyard Kipling and its beautiful! I’m adding it to my collection of Encouraging words, right next to Our Deepest Fear By Marianne Williamson. Thank you 🙂

      August 25, 2010 at 11:52 am

  4. I like sitting in a quiet room doing nothing, too. I only recently realized that. I used to think you have to meditate. But I think I more prefer vegetate. I used to think I need to be doing something to make my life better every second. It’s very scary to do nothing. But to someone with a lot of ambition, it’s an act of bravery.


    August 25, 2010 at 1:54 pm

    • carolkmail

      Thank you Penelope. Meditation only works for me when my mind is not going round in circles and not looking for solutions. Ever time I try to quieten it at such times, it only tries looking for solutions. So, vegetation, as incapacitating as it may sound, became my way of just being.

      August 25, 2010 at 2:00 pm

  5. I tell people: when I feel sad, I just decide to be happy. But they think it impossible. But another thing, I won’t let my vulnerability show to no one but myself, inside… so you will see me smile while I’m bleeding.

    August 25, 2010 at 5:53 pm

    • carolkmail

      Not all of us are talkers. I don’t talk much either. I’ll prefer to try and sort myself out, though it’s not always a healthy approach. What helps most is finding that one thing that helps you make sense of whatever you are feeling. I sit in a room in silence, or write on my Journal about why I’m sad and what it is I’m going to do to get out of that feeling. It does help most of the time.

      August 25, 2010 at 6:54 pm

  6. Magizani

    I think Yoga is good for the healing of the soul,and relaxation of the mind.It really helps me,whenever i am in a fix.

    September 17, 2010 at 8:59 pm

    • carolkmail

      I completely agree with you. I however use Yoga mostly for body relaxation. Meditation is my first choice of soul healing and mind purging.

      September 17, 2010 at 9:39 pm

  7. Solitude does it for me. Then again it does it for me even when I’m not feeling lost. Throw in good soft rock aaaand…. Lost? What lost.

    August 20, 2012 at 11:49 am

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