I generally love kids. More specifically, I love my kid more than anything else in this world. But. And I say this with a lot of love. Kids are germ carriers. Disease magnets. Vermin breeders. In fact, I’d go ahead and confidently say, if you were to place them under a giant microscope, you’d probably have creepy crawling thingies where their tiny bodies are supposed to be.
Once in a while, the germs that these kids port around does show up as full blown diseases. On such days, no one, and I mean NO ONE is immune to the said diseases. What, with them being suddenly and excessively needy, they even forget to blow their noses, and they go out of their way to look for you just so they can sneeze on your face. It even looks appropriate for them to hurl all over your shoes.
I’m supposed to take this on with tons of smiles. And I do my best. Only that when the sniffles and sneezes show up, I start counting down to the day the germs will start working on my relatively healthy body. I’m a planner. So during such countdowns, I already know how many days I’ll be down, how many boxes of tissues I’ll require, and I begin to paint the ceiling a different color, in preparation for my few days of staring blankly at it. All the while, I’m still trying my best, where possible to duck my vermin carrying boy, which I shall not have to tell you I fail miserably at. Unless I’m taking a bathroom break that is.
What is amazing is that every time these unsolicited attacks show up, they always catch us ill prepared, even with a list of things to do and fire fighting plans in place. We both get knocked on our behinds pretty good. We become nightmares to be around and we are both quite weepy! Not my fault! I swear!
We are just coming out of such a spell, and I can tell you, this appears to be more nasty than the last two combined. At least we are smiling and beginning to run around. We are not there yet, so don’t go getting ideas of paying a visit or antagonizing us. We will readily break down and cry. One thing these episodes are teaching me is that no matter how much planning you do, there are things that you will sail through via blind faith. Planning is good. But humans were never blessed with foresight. So we do our best, plan where we can, not plan where we cannot, and believe that we are going to be at the right place at the right time, even if it means the place is a weepy, slap your ass to the ground place.