Keeping Up with The Almost Williams

First of all, I am a hopeless romantic. Well, nearly. It should therefore come as no surprise that I have been following the almost wedding of the century. Neither should it come as a surprise that I am hoping to get invited to the said event. Yep! I dream too. And as I always say, if you are going to dream, dream big. Now like any event of the century, I can bet that there will be a game show called ‘Who Wants To Get Invited To Kate and William’s Wedding Of The Century’ and there will be a point where they will ask questions and allow viewers to sms their answers, to win a ticket to the said event. I’m sure the game show will have a shorter title but that’s not the point. When that day comes, guess who will be ready with necessary trivia and phone in hand? Yes. Me. And you know how I know I have a good chance of winning a ticket? The two were engaged in Kenya! Hallooo! It would only be fair to let a Kenyan (ahem me for instance) represent my peeps in such an event!

Speaking of which, is it me or does it seem like all we do these days is keep up with some idle lot somewhere? First it was some Kardashians. Still don’t know why we keep up with them, but since everyone seems to be trying to keep up, I am on that wagon. Now we are keeping up with the almost Williams. From the day we decided that the tube shall be feeding us our daily news and entertainment, we gave them the right to decide who to keep up with. I wonder who I have to kill to get me kept up with! My life is interesting. Really! It is! And it would do my ego wonders, if it was kept up with.

Anyway, the almost Williams are supposed to tie the knot (honestly, that sends shivers down my spine. Tie? Seriously?) round about end April somewhere. I wonder what big thing is going down then. Seeing as we have been following them around, doesn’t it feel like it will be such an anticlimax? After all the Royal Wedding fever that we have been subjected to, and having known so much about them I’d be surprised if there are no bedroom photos somewhere of the two. Gasp! Of course there aren’t such photos! What was I thinking? The Queen would have a fit should anything happen before the wedding night! The horror! But we have everything else anyway.

I hear they at one point even asked for wedding donations! I’m thinking, being such a fan and all, do you think sending them all of Kshs.500 would dent their budget? I know in a wedding in Kenya, that would mightily be appreciated, but seeing as I’m yet to come across their wedding budget, I’m just throwing a figure in the wind. But it’s the thought that counts, no? It does though, because the donations they have asked for are for charity. Which is really the one thing that impresses me. I know they don’t need the gifts but still the fact that they are thinking of utilizing our gushy, puppy-eyed willingness to donate by asking us to give to a worthy cause is what makes me follow them around and squeezing every morsel of news out of them.

So, as I wait for my invite, I’ll continue polishing up on trivia, lest they decide to have the trick question to get into the palace. You know…. Open Sesame…. or something. I also need to find out which Mpesa account to send my Kshs.500. I don’t want to mail the money. It is a long way and quite unsafe I would imagine.


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