– Plus Life and Times of carolkmail

Happy Mother’s Day Mummy

She is one of those women who always has a smile on her face. Seriously! I think the only time I saw my mum sport a no-nonsense look is when she opened a collective can of whoop-ass on us. Yes. I said collective. See, I was raised with a bunch of boys, so when it was whoop-ass time, it was done collectively. For current sins, sins we were thinking about and sins that were about to be committed. My brothers and I have always been a tight bunch. And since mother knew that, no one was exempted from punishment of the wrong doer. What was is she called it? Participation by hypocrisy.

For example, one of those old days, a long, long, long time ago, there was sugar shortage. Mummy got wind of availability of sugar in a village away from ours. Walking distance, but still away. She sent my brother and I to go and acquire the scarce commodity and get home as soon as possible. I don’t quite remember, but we must have left her making tea on that day. So off we went, and after being on a queue for like an eternity (must have been 15 minutes but that is a lifetime for kids who want to do nothing but play), it was our turn to buy the sugar. I’m not sure whose smart idea it was but we decided to buy some sweets called patcos. Those things were to die for! They turned into powder in your mouth. So with the change that we received after the purchase, which must have been a few shillings, we bought ourselves patcos. And they were many patcos! And we enjoyed! And we took our time getting home! But getting home we did. Mother asked us for change and we gleefully informed her that we had decided to reward ourselves for such hard work by buying the sinful sweets. I do not need to tell you what happened thereafter. I can tell you however that we were never that fond of sweets after the bea….. er… incident.

That’s mummy for you. When she got angry, she would yell ‘Waaanjiku!’ and I would be sure my can was ready for opening. O I could tell you stories, but lets not ruin your beautiful perception of the very nice me 😀 Yet, in all that, she found a way to love us like no one else can! She is a woman who has done so many things with such meager resources I cannot even imagine how she managed. She never missed a single day of my school’s visiting day, or my brothers. It never mattered how busy she was. And she never discriminates. The way she treats her kids is the same way she will treat her patients and everyone else around her. Yes, my dear mummy is a nurse. She makes the profession look like something you want to retire to. She cares so deeply that years later, patients come looking for her, to just thank her. With bananas and chickens and cabbages…. She readily does youth counseling, without asking for anything in return.

The other day she said to me, Wanjiku, I hope your son gives you the exact experience you have given me, and more. My mind went into panic mode! Searching for all the things I had done, hoping they were all good things. After counting a few incidents, including the patco incident, I decided to just blissfully hope that I had been a good daughter. I leave it at that. Blissful ignorance. No need to dredge up the past.

Happy mother’s day mummy. All I want is to be a fraction of who you are and I shall count myself blessed.

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40 responses

  1. Mothers. Some strong stuff they were made of those women. Me too, all I want is to be a fraction of who my mother is and I shall count myself lucky.

    My mother was a teacher all her life. She’s now retired. Some day a few school drop out thugs broke into our house in shags because there had been a fundraising at the local church and they believed she had kept the money. They got to her in the dead of night and scared her with crude weapons. Then one of them declared ‘we cant do this to Mwalimu. They left without bothering with them cash.

    May 9, 2011 at 7:19 am

    • carolkmail

      O wow! They must have loved Mwalimu! You think we can be half as good as our mothers ever? Happy mummy’s day to your mum dear 🙂

      May 10, 2011 at 6:33 am

  2. *Grins* ‘Participation by hypocrisy’…i’m so loving your mum. My mum used to be nurse too now she teaches people to be nurses and she’s pretty awesome. She’s the sort who can stare down a cobra 🙂 If I can have a quarter of the wisdom, strength, compassion & dignity she posseses, well, i’d be one lucky lady. Happy mother’s day dear.

    @ Shiko: Now that is scary

    May 10, 2011 at 9:12 am

    • carolkmail

      I totally hear you! Quarter wisdom, strength, compassion and dignity. Happy mother’s day to your mummy 🙂

      May 10, 2011 at 10:02 am

  3. Eer, Wanjiku, so you loved patcos? I was more into the other green ones, were they called “koo” or something like that? hmm, now I also know where you grew up! Thumbs up to your mum however for raising such a … ok, let me watch my tongue and leave it there!

    May 10, 2011 at 9:38 am

    • carolkmail

      Oy! 3 sins! 3! On one comment! You are almost in so much trouble young man! Yes Patcos rocked. Koos were too harsh on my tongue 😛

      May 10, 2011 at 10:05 am

  4. lol your mother sounds amazing! ah yes, i remember patcos!!!

    May 10, 2011 at 12:47 pm

    • carolkmail

      Yep! That she is! Patcos were eeeeeevil! 😀

      May 10, 2011 at 4:14 pm

  5. Hahahahaaa..This one.hmmm…Wait..just wait…and you know..i feel you have what it takes to be something bigger than your mom..yes,I mean it.

    May 11, 2011 at 3:04 pm

    • carolkmail

      I know what you are thinking…. Stop thinking it! Thanks, I hope I can be that 🙂

      May 12, 2011 at 5:53 am

  6. Loving the patcos

    You had me at “patcos.” How I miss them.

    May 11, 2011 at 7:51 pm

    • carolkmail

      Ahahaaaaa *dreamy eyes* Those were the patco days…. 😀

      May 12, 2011 at 5:54 am

  7. Why are we talking of patcos in past tense? They’re still around.

    May 12, 2011 at 12:56 pm

    • carolkmail

      Because, young lady, I shall not be caught admitting that I still run around looking for patcos at this ripe old age!

      May 12, 2011 at 1:06 pm

  8. Looks lyk I join the party quite late bt am stil in with a shout! Patcos were nice,but u’l agree the pleasure was quickly robbed off as they were in the habit of quickly melting away… the huge sugar coated ‘koo’ rocked!…(ireri the shopkeeper used to scoop em’ using a spoon 4 us cz they din come wrappd!)…so am back home n my mum starts with all the questioning of did u buy this,that,did u pass by kina nani’s…what did they say… my attempt to master ordinary speech wld be undone by the bulge on my cheek and if not that the clip clang in my mouth as i tried moving the huge sweet off the way…that’s the part where ‘mother’ asks 4 the change n realisez a few coins missing….the rest ..well is as good as your gues!….Great read as always

    May 13, 2011 at 7:33 pm

    • carolkmail

      Tahahaaaa! You could be my twin in another life! This story exact applies as well! But I was more of the powder in your mouth person. When you speak, it splatteres out and you have to be reminded to stop speaking with your mouth full! O I’d love to hear more of those childhood stories! 😀

      May 14, 2011 at 2:17 pm

  9. Whaat?! As I rummage for coins to send for fresh supply of patcos.

    May 14, 2011 at 8:20 am

    • carolkmail

      *whispering* I can afford now, so I buy in bulk si moja moja. *walks away*

      May 14, 2011 at 2:18 pm

  10. There were also those coin size biscuits that cost 10 cents a piece!….anyone who knowz what am talkin about?

    May 14, 2011 at 7:23 pm

    • carolkmail

      Yes, yes yeeeees! I remember them! They were perfect for our tiny mouths!

      May 16, 2011 at 5:31 am

  11. Zamentali I remember those! They’re still around but these days they sell them in packets. There’s two versions, one the kawa sweet ones and one is salty with cheese.

    May 16, 2011 at 5:23 am

    • carolkmail

      I am beginning to really worry about you Shiko. You have kept tabs on all these childhood goodies! Hmmmmm *whispers* Where can I get the salty with cheese? 😀

      May 16, 2011 at 5:32 am

      • Yes. Soon as you tell me where I can get goody goodys.

        May 26, 2011 at 11:06 am

  12. ALBOH

    Oh the those sweets….nearly sold my sister for one of those….not one of my proud moments!sounds like my ol’ gal…..my tu_mischievous acts were summarised into one errrr…u know.lovely woman tho…you took me back quite abit.

    May 17, 2011 at 8:45 am

    • carolkmail

      *gaaaaasp* I can’t believe you ALMOST sold your sister! I forced my brother on a kadate in exchange for 10 of those. *sigh* Long story. Yes, not one of my proudest moments either, but sweets had to be had! 😀 Now, spill! Quick! All those mischievous acts I want to hear! 😉

      May 17, 2011 at 10:39 am

  13. Today, I went to the beachfront with my kids. I found a sea shell and gave it to my 4 year old daughter and said “You can hear the ocean if you put this to your ear.” She placed the shell to her ear and screamed. There was a hermit crab inside and it pinched her ear. She never wants to go back! LoL I know this is totally off topic but I had to tell someone!

    May 22, 2011 at 8:41 am

    • carolkmail

      Ahahaaaa. Totally funny! Let’s see you convince her to send something to her ear again any time soon!

      May 24, 2011 at 4:40 pm

  14. ALBOH

    Late reply…..you forced your brother to do what!??i bet he still holds a grudge.Anyway..memorable mischief..ahhhmmm: stole sugar from the sugar bowl,replaced it with salt…..well there were visitors n lets just say tea was served :). the aftermath is still fresh…n i still dont get the lesson..”This is for replacing the the sugar with salt n not for taking the sugar” SMH,atleast that was the emphasis….still dont get it.

    May 24, 2011 at 4:16 pm

    • carolkmail

      *sigh* You hopeless child! Speaking as a not so hopeless child of course… How did you get through childhood, past adolescence (I shudder to think of tales yet to be told here), to adult hood? Jesus truly does save!

      May 24, 2011 at 4:42 pm

  15. Alboh

    Dont get me started…..adolescence is a blur..adulthood is a blast…n yeah,tis a miracle i got this far.stil think your childhood drama outdoes mine 🙂

    May 24, 2011 at 5:44 pm

    • carolkmail

      Then there was a mango tree climb that resulted in a sprain, which resulted in a thorough beating before first-aid and subsequent treatment was administered. I could do this all day son. Don’t test me. #TradingWarStories 😀

      May 24, 2011 at 6:08 pm

      • albohkim

        And then there was the skinny dips at a nearby river…almost drowned….which was followed by an awesome beating followed by a treat to the movies theater following day….still dont know how she knew;have my suspicions on tha resulting mpararo. #TradingWarStories 🙂

        May 25, 2011 at 7:11 am

      • carolkmail

        Yep! I’d go with the mpararo theory. Dead give away. That plus the smell of frogy, fungus infested waters. Yes, I’m taking liberties here and assuming that was your choice of swimming area. O and you do not want to know my river swim escapades. Really, you don’t 😀 Wait, can we start a veterans club? Childhood survivor victims thingie? Book club maybe? Help me out here! 😛

        May 25, 2011 at 1:32 pm

      • Anyone fished tadpoles thinking they would grow into fish? My mum kept throwing mine out before they matured into frogs though!

        May 26, 2011 at 10:50 am

      • carolkmail

        I knaaaw! And the canning involved would not stop us from fishing more of these tadpoles. And man, they used to stink!

        May 26, 2011 at 11:38 am

  16. Otieno Hongo apparently tadpoles made boobs grown. So girls in the village caught them and made them bite their flat chests.

    Or was it not tadpoles? I forget.

    May 26, 2011 at 11:26 am

    • carolkmail

      *gaaaaasp* I can’t believe you are letting boys into our little boobies secrets! *whispering* Yep tadpoles it was.

      May 26, 2011 at 11:36 am

    • Tadpoles? Better than silicone implants though! Maybe I should sell this idea to the those doctors on Beverly Hills!

      May 26, 2011 at 11:53 am

  17. Your mother should never know what became of her post. Ever!

    May 27, 2011 at 11:00 am

  18. Pingback: Happy Mother’s Day Mummy » Yoontu Entertainment

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